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Peacemaking

Love Your Enemies

One of the more well-known commands in Scripture is the command to “Love your enemies.” This was true when Jesus said it. And it’s still true for Christians today. The upcoming election and intense political strife of this season means all Christians need this reminder.

“You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’ But I say to you, Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, so that you may be sons of your Father who is in heaven. For he makes his sun rise on the evil and on the good, and sends rain on the just and on the unjust.”

Jesus (Matthew 5:43-45)

Christians and their Enemies

Everyone has enemies. It’s just a fact of life. The question is what you do with them.

Jesus’ parable of the unmerciful servant presents a severe warning for his disciples. In this parable, Jesus tells of a servant who was forgiven the debt of a lifetime by a merciful king. After having his own debt cancelled, he crosses paths with someone who owes him money then has them arrested and imprisoned until it is repaid in full. The man is rebuked and punished for his hypocrisy.

Jesus makes it clear that the Christian’s disposition should be marked by grace and mercy. Our attitude towards enemies must be anchored in the gospel. For, “while we were still sinners, Christ died for us” (Romans 5:8). Because we have received the grace of God, we give it.

“What if God treated me
the way I treat my enemies?”


Stop and ask, “What if God treated me the way I treat my enemies?” When Christians are harsh and mean-spirited towards their enemies they are not reflecting Christ, but the worldliness they have been called to turn away from.

Leave Your Enemies in God’s Hands

Have you ever heard someone resist your correcting by saying, “Only God can judge me!” Honestly, this is a terrifying truth. God is the judge, and his judgment will not miss the mark. He is perfectly just, and every sin will be revealed before him. The above statement is true, but it doesn’t give permission to “live and let live.”

“Beloved, never avenge yourselves, but leave it to the wrath of God, for it is written, ‘Vengeance is mine, I will repay, says the Lord.'”

Apostle Paul (Romans 12:19)

While the section above emphasizes grace and mercy towards one’s enemies, Christians are able to do that because they trust God’s judgment above their own. Evil will not go unpunished. But because God is love, Jesus took that punishment for us… and for those who confess and repent of their sin and place their faith in Jesus Christ. That invitation stands for our enemies.

So far, this is generally safe territory for Christians. The challenge comes when are asked whether or not we can celebrate over our enemy’s salvation. Are you willing to pray for him, worship and study the Bible with him, and minister to his children as fellow-members of the body of Christ? Or do you simply quote Romans 12:19 as a message of doom against those who have sinned against you?

Trust God’s judgment upon others as much as you trust his judgment upon yourself.

Loving Your Enemies

Christians carry the name of Christ. When we spread hate and judgment, we do so in the name of Christ. When we speak online with harsh words that we would be ashamed to say in front of our mother or pastor, we are still doing so in the name of Christ. In addition to many other commands these actions break – they break the 3rd Commandment: Thou shall not dishonor the name of the LORD your God.

Loving your enemy doesn’t mean you pretend they are a friend. That’s exactly what makes it so unique – it’s unnecessary, surprising, and you probably receive zero benefit from showing this kind of mercy. If you only love those who love you back, and if you only give to those who give back to you… then you’re no different from everyone else in the world. But if you love your enemy who believes and expects the worst about you then that’s truly Christlike. You can call this loving your enemy or you can call it Christian Tolerance, but it starts with generosity towards your enemy while continuing to acknowledge the important differences that continue to exist.

May our actions, words, and attitudes bring honor to the name of Christ Jesus. What if we stopped arguing back, and took a posture of genuine mercy?

“Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse them. Rejoice with those who rejoice, weep with those who weep. Live in harmony with one another. Do not be haughty, but associate with the lowly. Never be wise in your own sight. Repay no one evil for evil, but give thought to do what is honorable in the sight of all. If possible, so far as it depends on you, live peaceably with all. Beloved, never avenge yourselves, but leave it to the wrath of God, for it is written, “Vengeance is mine, I will repay, says the Lord.” To the contrary, “if your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink; for by so doing you will heap burning coals on his head.” Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.”

Romans 12:14-21
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Should We Forgive & Forget?

We’ve all been hurt. We’ve all been forgiven. We’ve all needed to be forgiven. But I seriously doubt we’ve forgotten.

“Forgive and forget” sounds good advice until you’re the one hearing it. When the conflict is personal and when the hurt is deep, it seems like you’re expected to do something impossible. And for the Christian, it begs the question: Is “forgive and forget” biblical?

Does God Forgive and Forget?

I am so thankful we serve a forgiving God! The Bible teaches that “All have sinned and fall short of the glory of God” (Romans 3:23) and “There is no one on earth who is righteous” (Ecclesiastes 7:20). You can say you’re a pretty good person, but the fact is no one has perfectly kept all of God’s commands.

Jesus died on the cross in order to forgive our sins and to remove the judgment we earned for ourselves (Romans 6:23).  We have been forgiven and washed clean through faith in Jesus Christ, “There is… no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus” (Romans 8:1).

Isaiah 42:25 says the LORD will “sweep away your transgressions…and remember them no more.” This, however doesn’t mean that God literally forgets them. Instead, the power of sin has been swept away, so God does not call it to mind anymore. We see this portrayed in Jesus’ very own body.

Jesus was crucified and nailed to the cross. When he rose from the grave, we know he still had nail holes in his hands. We know this, because Jesus showed them to Thomas when he said he wouldn’t believe Jesus rose unless he saw them and touched them. (John 21:24-29)

Jesus’ “resurrection body” still had scars. He remembered the sin for which he died. He remembered Thomas’ doubt. He perfectly forgave and remembered.

Forgiveness & Trust

God’s children are commanded to do as Christ did: to forgive and reconcile, even if it requires great sacrifice. We are called to be peacemakers (Matt. 5:9) and agents of reconciliation (2 Cor. 5:11-21). If Christians only show kindness and mercy towards those who are kind and merciful to them, then how are they any different from nonChristians (Luke 6:27-36)? Instead, Jesus called his disciples to a bold kind of mercy.

We can give forgiveness to those who hurt us. Sometimes forgiveness can take a long time to really give, and that’s ok. The deeper the offense, the longer it will take before you can really forgive that person. Don’t rush it. It’s ok to say, “I want to forgive you, and I’m trying to. But I’m just not ready yet, I need more time.”

“He who walks with the wise becomes wise. A companion of fools suffers harm” (Proverbs 13:20). If you suffered harm because you were hanging out with fools, then forgive them but don’t start walking with them again!

Forgiveness is given. Trust, however, is earned. If a person has shown themselves to be untrustworthy, it is not a mark of wisdom to put your trust in them. At the same time, Christians are people who live with the daily reminder that God has redeemed them and transformed their lives. Of course God can do the same thing for this untrustworthy person who has caused us harm.

So what are we to do? For the most part, forgiveness means you give someone the opportunity to regain your trust, but that starts in the small things and slowly increases as people prove their repentance and trustworthiness.

Pray for Wisdom

Life is complicated. Relationships are messy. We all need to pray for wisdom, and live with a heart that desires to glorify God. This may lead us back to people who caused great pain in our lives. God can bring is truly beautiful and miraculous healing and redemption.

As you navigate broken or strained relationships – pray for God’s wisdom. Keep your eyes fixed on Jesus Christ, who loved you while you were still his enemy. Remember Jesus’ prayer for his own crucifiers, “Father, forgive them. For they do not know what they are doing.” And in your heart, ask the Holy Spirit to give you a desire to forgive and be reconciled. That is the starting point for all potential reconciliation. From that point, pray for wisdom and for the peace of the Holy Spirit. Because not every broken relationship will be mended on this side of eternity… but living with resentment and anger is contrary to the way of the cross.

(note: this post is an edited/revised version of an older post)

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Is “Forgive and Forget” Biblical?

We’ve all been hurt. We’ve all been forgiven. We’ve all needed to be forgiven. But some hurts are simply too difficult to truly forget.

“Forgive and forget” sounds good advice until you’re the one hearing it. Then, when it’s personal and when the hurt is deep, it seems like you’re expected to do something impossible. And for the Christian, it begs the question: Is “forgive and forget” biblical?

cloud-over-mountains
Continue reading “Is “Forgive and Forget” Biblical?” →

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